Just my BiPAP and me, struggling to breathe after a wasp sting
I’m grateful most days for the tools that help me live with MG; today I resent them
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Lying in bed while I type this from my phone, I’m annoyed, possibly even aggravated. I’ve been in this same position for most of the afternoon, impersonating Darth Vader while tethered to my BiPAP.
My diaphragm has decided to be a passenger princess again, refusing to do the job it was designed for. Moments like this are a frustrating reminder of how quickly myasthenia gravis (MG) can shift the course of my day.
I was stung by a wasp on a kamikaze mission yesterday. The last time this happened — about a year and a half ago — the sting triggered a symptom flare that landed me in the ER. I waited too long to take antihistamines and extra MG meds, and my body paid the price. That experience taught me to respond quickly when something unexpected happens.
Air hunger creeps in
So this time, the moment I flung the invader off my hand, I ran it under cold water, took antihistamines and additional prednisone, and iced the sting. The ice helped with the pain and, hopefully, slowed the spread of whatever toxins were now making themselves at home in my body. This is where having a strong relationship with my care team becomes invaluable. I have a protocol for acute situations like this, one tailored specifically to me, so I know exactly how much extra medication I can take before it’s time to head to the ER.
About 15 minutes later, I felt air hunger creeping in. I got on my BiPAP and stayed on it, with elevated pressure, for the rest of the afternoon and evening. Needing it yesterday made sense. Needing it again today? That’s just plain aggravating.
I hate being stuck in one place because the machine isn’t portable. It’s frustrating when something as small as a wasp sting triggers a flare, even though I’m not allergic. And it’s depressing to feel mostly fine, except for the breathing, yet still be stuck in bed instead of working at my computer.
Most days, I’m grateful for the tools that help me live with MG. But there are days like today when I resent needing them at all. In the past, pride would have pushed me to avoid using the BiPAP, even when I clearly needed it. Pride is a dangerous beast. The longer I live with MG, the more I accept that using these tools isn’t weakness. It’s wisdom.
Living with MG is full of ups and downs, sometimes happening at the exact same time. I can be thankful for the machine helping me breathe while also being frustrated that I need it. Both truths can coexist. Sometimes living my best life means accepting the reality of today so tomorrow has a chance to be better.
Note: Myasthenia Gravis News is strictly a news and information website about the disease. It does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. This content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on this website. The opinions expressed in this column are not those of Myasthenia Gravis News or its parent company, Bionews, and are intended to spark discussion about issues pertaining to myasthenia gravis.
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