Michelle Gonzaba, of San Antonio, Texas, was diagnosed with myasthenia gravis (MG) in 2011. She shares how one can find their footing when overwhelmed by grief.
Transcript
When I was first experiencing symptoms — so even before I knew what was going on with my body — I was just having all this weakness. When I was first coming across myasthenia gravis, I was like, “What is this?” trying to understand it. And then being diagnosed, the first thing I had to do was stop reading about it. I know that’s kind of like counter to maybe what some people say.
But for me, the more I got into, like, not just the basics — like this is what it is, these are the treatments, this is how some people handled it — it’s like I was looking for the worst parts, like the worst articles about it, the really bad ways it could go.
So for me, it was kind of pulling myself out of those types of articles and things, like there’s really great articles, like hopeful articles. Like go read those things: the people that are like, “Yeah, I have it, but this is what I’m doing and this is what’s working and this is what’s not.”
Stability for me too, honestly, like it sounds very simple, but just going outside — like depending on how you are doing physically — if you can take a walk, go take a walk outside. If you really can’t walk very well, if the weakness is really bad in your legs, just be able to go out into a chair and sit outside on your front porch or in your yard or something like that.
I think grounding yourself in the outdoors and getting some sun — I know that sounds very simple, but for me, that’s helped me a lot with kind of recentering myself in my head. Because it kind of lets me just, “Look, like, yeah, OK, things can be really bad.” And again, it’s that honesty, right? Be honest with yourself. This “I’m not feeling good today. Like my grief is it’s really bad. I feel really low.” But then knowing that that’s not going to stick around forever.
I also think about times when I’ve been low for other reasons that are not related to my disease. And I thought, “Well, those times didn’t last forever either.” So it’s kind of just putting yourself in perspective, whether that’s you want to go outside, talk to friends, talk to family. And then if it’s not — if you’re still kind of stuck in that grief, maybe reach out, go to your doctor, maybe there’s a therapist or a mental health specialist that can help you with that as well.
