How I’ve been disarming the awkwardness of heavy sweating

In the Sept. 24 article “Y’all Vs. Ya’ll: Here’s How To Spell It” in Southern Living, the author Grace Haynes writes, “The South is known for its laundry list of unique, quirky, cultural sayings, like ‘Bless your heart,’ ‘Too big for his britches,’ and ‘Well, I s’wanee,’ to name a few.”

As I’m a transplanted Yankee who loves language, Southern dialects raise my interest and sometimes make me laugh. I recently discovered a common Southern phrase those of us who use Mestinon (pyridostigmine bromide) might find humorous. It can ease the embarrassment that may accompany one or more of the drug’s possible side effects.

In 2020, I was diagnosed with myasthenia gravis (MG). Since then, Mestinon has been part of my treatment regimen. It’s a great drug and has helped ease my MG symptoms. But it has side effects. Excessive sweating, also known as hyperhidrosis, is the most difficult for me.

I’m not sure those who haven’t experienced hyperhidrosis are able to understand exactly how much I sweat. If they could, I think they’d empathize with me. This condition isn’t unique to me and resonates with many who take Mestinon.

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My perspiration is profuse. Sweat runs down my face and arms. If I’ve been working at my desk, I leave behind small puddles. Often before I leave the house, I sit under a ceiling fan to dry off. When someone comes to pick me up, I frequently ask for extra time to dry off. It’s not unusual for me to change shirts two or three times a day.

Family and friends understand my hyperhidrosis and accommodate my episodes. With them I don’t feel any embarrassment. When outside that world, however, I’m frequently embarrassed. While on an intellectual level I know most people hardly notice me, in the moment it’ll feel as if everyone is looking at me and wondering what’s wrong. Do they think I’m shoplifting? Or have they concluded that I’m seriously out of shape or suffering from a contagious disease?

That reaction can impact my mental health, sometimes making me depressed. That feeling has made me reluctant to attend certain events or visit certain places. Even shopping trips to the mall can be difficult. Last July I was in a department store trying on clothes, and I perspired so heavily that I left without making a purchase. I did leave a trail of sweat in my wake.

The right phrase for the moment

Recently, after spending weeks at home trying to recover from a setback, I went grocery shopping. I know others hate trips to the supermarket, but I love them. Roaming the aisles, checking for bargains, and bumping into friends are things I enjoy.

That day I didn’t sweat until I headed up the second aisle. Then my pores opened and we were off to the races. When I finished shopping, I was too embarrassed to use the regular checkout lines. Instead, I used the self-checkout as perspiration flowed from my head and caused my eyeglasses to slip off. By the time I was ready to leave, I was soaked, angry, and mortified.

One of the clerks stared at me, unsure what was wrong. I wanted to make light of the moment and remembered an old Southern phrase I haven’t had many occasions to use. I smiled and said, “I know, I’m sweating like a whore in church.” She laughed, and the embarrassment evaporated.

I don’t want anyone to be offended. The USC (University of Southern California) Digital Folklore Archives has an analysis of the phrase that explains why it isn’t offensive. “This is because the simile utilizes humor. A whore in a church doesn’t really sweat profusely, but to imagine the scenario is funny to those who encounter the simile. The vast difference between the person saying the simile and the whore in the simile also adds to the humor.”

Sometimes, when we make light of a situation, things are more bearable. That can be especially true for those of us who deal with MG and other rare diseases. Try to bring some humor into difficult or embarrassing situations. Y’all are free to use my “whore in church” phrase when appropriate.

Note: Myasthenia Gravis News is strictly a news and information website about the disease. It does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. This content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on this website. The opinions expressed in this column are not those of Myasthenia Gravis News or its parent company, Bionews, and are intended to spark discussion about issues pertaining to myasthenia gravis.