If You Are Scared but Act Anyway, You Are Courageous
I am currently composing this column six hours out from my transsternal thymectomy. Five mishaps leading up to the surgery have gone wrong on the scheduling side, and then the COVID-19 office lost my test.
I have been relatively happy leading up to this, but it seems everything is working against me. But I find that when I am most vulnerable, I gain extensive wisdom.
We spend so much of our lives forming expectations, planning, and stressing. We often forget that our fate has already been written by a higher being or the universe, somewhere, at some time. Even if this looks different from what we had planned or anticipated, think good thoughts that all will go well and release anxious ones. No amount of worry or sadness can alter the trials we have coming ahead.
We must permit ourselves to express, but do not let emotions take control. Allow negative energy to flow and be released in a healthy manner. A therapist can offer the best solutions. But to start, this can include journaling, discussing, getting fresh air, exercising, hugging, crying, and dancing. We can attempt to control our emotions and thoughts, but doing so without support will mean carrying unnecessary weight.
When we become overwhelmed by all that is out of our power, it is easy to get caught up believing our negative self-talk. We cannot let our thoughts take control, especially when we are emotionally weak.
I regularly find myself in complete denial when my friends and loved ones remind me of my resilience and bravery. However, we need to trust them and their reminders of our courageousness.
We must pull ourselves back into alignment and grounding with how capable we are. Get in the habit of interrupting anxious thoughts with things like, “What if all goes smoothly?” “Times of discomfort will only last for a short section of my entire life.” “What if I recover better than predicted?” “Not every aspect of the surgery and hospital stay will go wrong.” “One day at a time.”
The fact that we have continued to show up every day is an example of our bravery as MG warriors. If we did all the things we can, we would astonish ourselves.
We must always trust the process and our immense abilities. Going through things we never thought we’d go through will only take us to places we never thought we’d reach.
Disentangle our minds, unwind our souls, and let go of any unnecessary weights. Breathe through anger and frustration. Breathe away worries and anxiety. Breathe warmth and light into darkness.
What a gift it is to feel so immensely all the emotions and sensations life offers.
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